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What Is Complicated Grief?

Complicated grief is a recently recognized condition that occurs in about 7% of bereaved people. People with this condition are caught up in rumination about the circumstances of the death, worry about its consequences, or excessive avoidance of reminders of the loss. Unable to comprehend the finality and consequences of the loss, they resort to excessive avoidance of reminders of the loss as they are tossed helplessly on waves of intense emotion.

Shear MK. Grief and mourning gone awry: pathway and course of complicated grief. Dialogues Clin Neurosci. 2012 Jun;14(2):119-28.

How Common Is Complicated Grief? 
Complicated grief affects between 2% to 3% of the population worldwide and 7% to 10% of bereaved people. It amounts to millions of people in the U.S. alone. This condition is characterized by intense grief that lasts longer than would be normally expected and that impairs daily functioning. Complicated grief can follow the loss of any close relationship, especially after the death of a romantic partner and among parents who have lost a child.

Association of Cognitive & Behavioral Therapies

Coping and Support
Although it's important to get professional treatment for complicated grief, these strategies also may help you cope:

* Stick to your treatment plan. Attend therapy appointments as scheduled and practice skills learned in therapy. If needed, take medications as directed.

* Practice stress management. Learn how to better manage stress. Unmanaged stress can lead to depression, overeating, or other unhealthy thoughts and behaviors.

* Take care of yourself. Get enough rest, eat a healthy diet and take time to relax. Exercise regularly. Physical activity can help relieve stress, depression and anxiety. Don't turn to alcohol or recreational drugs for relief.

* Reach out to your faith community. If you follow religious practices or traditions, you may gain comfort from rituals or guidance from a spiritual leader.

* Socialize. Stay connected with people you enjoy being around. They can offer support, a shoulder to cry on or shared laughter to give you a little boost.

* Plan ahead for special dates or anniversaries. Holidays, anniversaries and special occasions can trigger painful reminders of your loved one. Find new ways to celebrate, positively reminisce or acknowledge your loved one that provide you comfort and hope.

* Learn new skills. If you were highly dependent on your loved one, for example, to handle the cooking or finances, try to master these tasks yourself. Ask family, friends or professionals for guidance, if necessary. Seek out community classes and resources, too.

* Join a support group. You may not be ready to join a support group immediately after your loss, but over time you may find shared experiences comforting and you may form meaningful new relationships.

Mayo Clinic